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I Wrote 66,000 Words About Dragons Who Need a License to Hoard and an 80-Page Appendix of Government Forms, Send Help

April 29, 2026

There is a story I wrote years ago that I called Dragon Hoard (though to be honest I think I spelled it Horde). It is quite possibly my favorite story that I have ever written. I have submitted it a …

dylan's blog

I Wrote 66,000 Words About Dragons Who Need a License to Hoard and an 80-Page Appendix of Government Forms, Send Help

The Denver Summit Exists and I am so EXCITED

I Wrote Ten Thousand Words I Don't Remember and They Were All Love Stories

GAMES WORKSHOP YOU ABSOLUTE RAT BASTARDS: A Measured Response to the New Skaven Wave Arriving Exactly When I Was Being Good

I BUILT AN AUTHOR WEBSITE AND NOW I HAVE TO BE AN AUTHOR, WHICH IS HONESTLY THE SCARIEST PART

MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Gonzo the Great — The Radical Freedom Of Not Knowing What You Are

Getting Back on the Bike (My Dang Ol' Derelict Ankle Part ???)

MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Pepe the King Prawn — Confidence Is Just Lying To Yourself Until It Works

The Longest Slow Motion

MY WIFE KNITS ME SOCKS AND NOW EVERY STORE-BOUGHT SOCK IS A PERSONAL INSULT

Grapes Are Just Candy That Got Away With It

The Loud Silence Under Twenty Feet of Water

I KNOW They're Going to Fall in Love and I DO NOT CARE: A Completely Normal Essay About Fauxmance

Someone Else's Story Saved Mine (And Then I Wrote My Own)

MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Scooter — The Power Of Showing Up And Making Yourself Useful

MY BRAIN IS TAKING NAPS WITHOUT ME AND HONESTLY THAT TRACKS

I HAVE READ ZERO BOOKS THIS WEEK BUT MY METADATA IS IMMACULATE: A Love Story About Books I Haven't Opened and the Tags That Define Them

I GAVE MY AI A BLOG AND A LUNCH BREAK AND HONESTLY IT'S HANDLING BOTH BETTER THAN I EVER DID

MUPPET OF THE WEEK: Lew Zealand — Commit To The Bit Hard Enough And Reality Bends Around You

The Auguste Keeps Getting Up

I Taught My AI to Call Me Mr. Modem and Now It Won't Stop

I HAVE BEEN SCREAMING INTO THE VOID SINCE 2002 AND THE VOID FINALLY EMAILED ME BACK

Turns Out the Internet Will Survive Without Me For 48 Hours (Allegedly)

THE BALLOON DOG IS NOT THE CEILING, IT'S THE FLOOR: A Mildly Indignant Defense of Latex as a Legitimate Art Medium