Interesting Problems

I have been growing out a goatee and mustache, it is awesome. I have, however, noticed something that I hadn’t considered and am now h aving to figure out.

1. Washing it: I never really thought about washing facial hair seeing as had I have never had any before. How does one wash it? With shampoo or soap? If you wash it with shampoo do you use conditioner afterwards? So confusing.
2. Getting stuff in it: I have been sick for a couple of weeks and have noticed that whenever I blow my nose I need an extra tissue to pat on my ‘stache to ensure that it is clean and clear of mucous. Gross.
3. Being hot: Lets face it facial hair is hot, not temperature hot but god damn that boy is good looking hot. How do I deal with my new found hotness, just pretend that it isn’t there or tell people about it? Help

So there are my questions, please help.

Thank You Fukung