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I SELECTED ALL AND HIT ARCHIVE AND HONESTLY IT WAS THE BEST THING I EVER DID

March 8, 2026

A massive overflowing mailbox shaped like a dumpster fire, letters and newsletters and “SUBSCRIBE NOW” banners pouring out of it like lava, a tiny man standing next to it looking absolutely serene while holding a phone that just says “call me” on the screen, the mailbox has a single tear rolling down its face, a vulture perched on top wearing a lanyard that says “MARKETING TEAM”, suburban neighborhood background with every other house’s mailbox looking normal

Look.

I used to love email. I genuinely, sincerely, hand-on-my-heart loved email. There was a time — and I know this sounds like your grandpa talking about walking uphill both ways — when getting an email felt like getting a letter. Someone sat down, thought about what they wanted to say to you, typed it out, and hit send. It arrived in your inbox with a little chime and you thought, “oh, someone is talking to me specifically.” It was personal. It was intentional. It was nice.

That time is dead. We killed it. Well — marketers killed it, but we held the door open for them.

The Day I Snapped

Sometime right before the pandemic — and I wish I could tell you the exact date because it deserves a national holiday — I opened my inbox, looked at the 4,000-something unread emails staring back at me, and I did something beautiful.

I selected all.

I hit archive.

All of them. Every single one. Gone. Not deleted — I’m not a monster — but archived. Swept under the digital rug. Banished to the shadow realm of “technically still accessible if I really need them.”

And you know what happened? Nothing. Absolutely nothing bad happened. The world kept spinning. Nobody died. No critical business deal fell apart. Because here’s the thing I realized in that moment: everyone who actually needs to reach me has my phone number.

That’s it. That’s the whole revelation. It’s not complicated. It’s not a productivity hack. It’s just… true.

The Garbage Ratio

Here’s what email has become. For every one email that matters — a real human being saying a real thing to you — you get approximately five thousand that are:

  • A newsletter you subscribed to in 2019 because they had a free PDF about something you’ve completely forgotten
  • A retailer letting you know that THE SALE IS ENDING (it is never ending)
  • LinkedIn telling you that someone you met at a conference seven years ago has a work anniversary
  • Your bank confirming that yes, you did in fact buy that coffee
  • Some service’s weekly digest of content you will never, ever read
  • An email about updating your email preferences

And the worst part? There’s no fixing it. I’ve tried. I’ve hit unsubscribe so many times my finger has muscle memory for finding the tiny gray text at the bottom of emails. You know what happens when you unsubscribe? Two things: sometimes it works, and sometimes it signs you up for three more lists because apparently “unsubscribe” is just “subscribe but sneakier.”

There are no tools that solve this. I’ve looked. Every “clean your inbox” app just becomes another thing sending you emails about how clean your inbox is. The irony is so thick you could spread it on toast.

How I Actually Handle It Now

So here’s the practical bit, because I know someone’s reading this thinking “okay but you run a business, Dylan, you can’t just not do email.”

You’re right. Kind of.

I run nervous.net, and email is unfortunately still how a lot of business happens. But here’s my secret weapon: Steve. Steve is an email boss. Steve lives in the inbox like it’s a cozy apartment and he’s got the place exactly how he likes it. Steve reads the emails, triages the emails, and then texts me when something actually requires my eyeballs.

This system works shockingly well. It turns out that most “urgent” emails are not urgent. Most “action required” emails require no action. And most “quick question” emails are neither quick nor really questions — they’re requests wearing a trench coat.

For everything else? Call me. Text me. Send me a message on Discord. Literally any other communication channel that hasn’t been colonized by people trying to sell me a mattress.

What Email Should Be

I’m not saying email should die. I’m saying email should go back to being what it was — a way to send someone a message that matters. A letter. A real communication between real people about real things.

Not a marketing channel. Not a notification system. Not a receipt printer. Not a newsletter platform. Just… mail. Electronic mail. The emphasis should be on the mail part, not the how many of these can we blast out per second part.

Until that happens — and it won’t, because there’s too much money in ruining things — I’ll be over here with my archived inbox and my phone number, living my best life.

You know where to find me. Just don’t email me about it (I mean… you can, I am trying to be better at email but it still sucks).